Who are you looking for?

“I learned in this class that I have to find a woman who can handle me! A wallflower just won’t do; I’ll walk all over her. Now I know what to look for.”

Working with an evaluation firm, I was conducting focus groups in the city of Milwaukee with people who had attended a class on how to successfully form romantic relationships. The young man indeed had a strong personality and had worked hard during the group conversation to manage his desire to monopolize. I could understand his point!

While I remained in the mode of a neutral listener as he spoke, inside I was grinning for joy. The revelation he had received during the section on understanding personality types was important. It could help prevent wasted time in ill-matched relationships as he searched for “the one.” It might even save him from a troubled marriage.

The message to know who you are and the personality type that might be best for you proved to be a favorite over and over again through the years that I conducted focus groups with healthy relationship education participants.

It’s a simple lesson; get to know who you are as part of your search to find love. Besides a myriad of persoanlity paradigms available commercially that might classify you as an INFJ, a Golden Retriever , a Type A or a “red,” online dating sites provide surveys to help you figure out who you are. Even if you don’t want to use the site, the assessments are specifically designed for those looking for love.

If you don’t know much about you, consider ways to get to know your self better!